Friday, January 14, 2011

Adderall

Started Adderall yesterday.  

It has been a very long road getting to ADD treatment.  It may seem weird to someone from the outside that a nearly 30 year old woman was just diagnosed as ADD.  You may ask why was this not caught while she was in school or mentioned by a manager once she grew up.  If I had to guess I would say it is because she is a girl.  For some reason ADD is considered a boys disorder, and the facts are that girls have many of the same symptoms, in fact nearly all the same symptoms, but seem to lack the hyperactivity that is stereotyped by teachers and drug manufacturers.  

Did I have trouble staying focused when I was a kid?  Well yes, but I was a "good student".  I daydreamed an awful lot while in class, went to the bathroom more then most, wandered the halls often, and was always the center of attention with my friends.  I could not answer questions from the teacher when called upon and often had trouble "hearing" what was said.  I still have that problem.  You can be talking right in front of me, I can be looking at you and then I am just not hearing what you are saying.  

For the last 10 years I have been searching for an answer about why I was like that.  No one had an answer.  No medical doctor(3), OBGYN(4), counselor(5), psychiatrist(2), lots of lab tests to rule out metabolism issues, diabetes, cancer, thyroid and many mental illness evaluations.  I have tried 4 or 5 anti-depressants, 2 maybe 3 anxiety disorder medications, diet changes, job changes, vitamins and read lots of self help books, (that might be an overstatement, it was more like read a few pages before I got bored).

I took one yesterday, 10 mg Extended release.  At first it made me feel like I had heartburn, then I felt a quiet calmness.  Weird for a drug that makes normal people freak out, I mean it is the same active drug that is in Methamphetamine, and those druggies are weird, twitchy, and can't sit still.  

I took one today and no heartburn, just the quiet calmness.  So here I am

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