So what else have you done this week? Oh, I am glad you asked. I have been crazy busy! Mostly doing the thing everyone likes least; dealing with Social Services. I absolutely hate this process! It is quite demeaning and absolutely time consuming.
The quest for assistance continues. Last month, March 2012, I and my children were dropped from the Arizona Medicaid Program twice! It was upsetting, frustrating. Plagued by trying to do the right thing, we were dropped for failure to provide proof of income. Why? Oh it went to the wrong address and was delayed! So we didn't recieve notifcation that additional information was needed until after Medicaid had dropped us. Many phone calls, okay just 2, but it was well over 2.5hours on the phone with an actual person! I can't tell you how long I spent on hold.... So thinking everything is fixed and good to go. I went about my family business and searched for a job.
Then I learned it was again dropped and that they said since I had quit working voluntarily I and my children were to remain ineligible for 1 year! Absolute craziness!!!!!!!! Yes, I admit I stopped going to work, but only because I could not afford to FEED my three children and pay for CHILD CARE for one child. I was forced to make a choice, between maintaining my families status on the food Stamp program so we could eat, or leaving my 2 year old unattended, so I could go to work! This was the choice I was faced with because Arizona cut all funding to the Child Care Subsidy program in 2008 to balance the budget and I was not making an adequate commission from Aflac. (Not all my fault, but not all Aflac's fault either.) Eventually a few supervisors understood what I was trying to explain, and helped me fix the situation, or so I am told. Currently, we do not have food stamps to buy food, which could be because I misunderstood when we would receive them, or because we were dropped again.
Onward! More Social Services fun! A while back my five year old was on an IEP in the Developmental Preschool, then I was told he was ineligible for his kindergarten year, but if I received a diagnosis he would be reconsidered for an evaluation at school. Alas, I presented the school with a copy of the Psychiatrist notes and requested he be re-evaluated the second week of school. Nearly the end of the school year he has not been re-evaluated! His teacher has begun to express concern about his ability to grip a pencil and scissors properly, aka -motor skills are falling behind! Unable to move the mountain that is the IEP process at Peoria Unified I have begun pursing the other avenues of assistance. The Arizona Department of Developmental Disabilities and Social Security Disability Income. At this point I hope that one of these government agencies will be able to assist me so that he does not fall further behind. Perhaps one can provide us with ideas on how to improve his motor skills, reading skills and social understanding of the world around him or even provide us with financing to give him Occupational Therapy or Physical Therapy for his motor skills development. Aggregated, yes. This process is very time consuming! If I had a job I am not certain I would be able to peruse any assistance for my son.
The shear amount of paperwork working with all the agencies has created in the last 45 days is appalling. My poor 3 inch binder has become overwhelmed. Between my desire to better manage my own ADHD issues and to prevent my son from suffering needlessly when he can learn to work better with his abilities, the folder is exploding. The problem is all the agencies want a copy of what the other agency has done, what the other physician has stated, ect. So, I keep copies! Soon I will have to separate my own paperwork from the families, and possibly his from the families, just so I don't end up with back problems from carrying all the papers with me.
I will likely separate mine from the families later today. Simply working with the Social Worker at Fresh Start Women's Center, my counselor at Terros, my Vocational Rehabilitation Intake Worker, and my own physicians/psychiatrist is a Martha Steward organizational wet dream. Thank God, that I am pretty anal retentive, and good at organizing endless streams of paper!
Exasperated.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Secrets, Secrets, secrets
I am not going to tell you my secrets. Besides you already know most of the secrets anyway. Its not hard, read the archive.
Back to interviewing for jobs. I received a job offer today. I think I accepted. Not sure about it so I applied at the Sign A Rama on the way home. Still have to return the call for the Credit Card Processor Company and talk to that lady at the Temp Agency that offered me a position that last 8 months but doesn't have an official start date. So is it wrong to keep looking? Even though I have two offers and I have accepted both offers, yet neither starts this week, is it wrong?
Right now it seems like all I really want to do is stuff for the Boy Scouts of America, Pack 293 in Peoria, but finding a job keeps getting in my way. Just not enough hours in the day to do everything I want to do. I want to write and edit a draft of our Charter, which we don't have! I want to edit and put together a New Parent Orientation, because I think it is important. I want to officially declare that I want the Committee Chair Position to our Chartered Organization Representative. But again, I need to find a job. Maybe I won't find a job that allows me to be the Committee Chair, or worse one that wants me to not be part of the Cub Scouts. (I have found several of those.)
What is wrong with the world when they don't want people who are invested in the community? I don't know. I will keep applying. Found four or five more to send resumes to this evening after Cub Scouts.
I should be cooking dinner right now, but I am not, my eight year old is. I am looking for work, while my toddler runs around with his pants off again! He is outside trying to make me crazy! My laundry still needs to be folded and my head hurts.
The house buying is on track. Yet I worry because I want to find a job before the short sale is approved so we can qualify for a VA home loan instead. I am desperate for a job, but seem to be unable to find work that offers an hourly wage or salary. I am busy like no one else I know. I applied for Vocational Rehabilitation for myself and continue to work to get that going. I applied for social security disability income for my five year old. I figured it was time that he get the assistance he needed, like physical therapy for his motor skills, but have been told this process will take an agonizing 6-8 months. Grrr!
Why is it when you are the most desperate for a job, you simply can't find one? And why is it that you can get a job, but not when you need it? Why has the world become so politically correct that you can't tell an interviewer the truth about why you quit a job, or what you are searching for in a company? Why do we need to keep secret the truth of what motivated an action or motivates us today? I don't know. Today, I answered truthfully about why I wanted a job, not just a little bit of the truth but the whole thing. I was offered the job, yet I am still somehow unsatisfied, because I had to hold back why I quit some previous employers.
In case you are wondering those are not hypothetical questions. I want to know why sharing the whole truth has become a bad thing to do. I want to understand why the non-ADHD world is so different from the ADHD world of complete openness, acceptance and compassion. Other questions like Why are so many people following me on Digg? I haven't posted anything there in months, yet I get new followers everyday. Weird.
Back to interviewing for jobs. I received a job offer today. I think I accepted. Not sure about it so I applied at the Sign A Rama on the way home. Still have to return the call for the Credit Card Processor Company and talk to that lady at the Temp Agency that offered me a position that last 8 months but doesn't have an official start date. So is it wrong to keep looking? Even though I have two offers and I have accepted both offers, yet neither starts this week, is it wrong?
Right now it seems like all I really want to do is stuff for the Boy Scouts of America, Pack 293 in Peoria, but finding a job keeps getting in my way. Just not enough hours in the day to do everything I want to do. I want to write and edit a draft of our Charter, which we don't have! I want to edit and put together a New Parent Orientation, because I think it is important. I want to officially declare that I want the Committee Chair Position to our Chartered Organization Representative. But again, I need to find a job. Maybe I won't find a job that allows me to be the Committee Chair, or worse one that wants me to not be part of the Cub Scouts. (I have found several of those.)
What is wrong with the world when they don't want people who are invested in the community? I don't know. I will keep applying. Found four or five more to send resumes to this evening after Cub Scouts.
I should be cooking dinner right now, but I am not, my eight year old is. I am looking for work, while my toddler runs around with his pants off again! He is outside trying to make me crazy! My laundry still needs to be folded and my head hurts.
The house buying is on track. Yet I worry because I want to find a job before the short sale is approved so we can qualify for a VA home loan instead. I am desperate for a job, but seem to be unable to find work that offers an hourly wage or salary. I am busy like no one else I know. I applied for Vocational Rehabilitation for myself and continue to work to get that going. I applied for social security disability income for my five year old. I figured it was time that he get the assistance he needed, like physical therapy for his motor skills, but have been told this process will take an agonizing 6-8 months. Grrr!
Why is it when you are the most desperate for a job, you simply can't find one? And why is it that you can get a job, but not when you need it? Why has the world become so politically correct that you can't tell an interviewer the truth about why you quit a job, or what you are searching for in a company? Why do we need to keep secret the truth of what motivated an action or motivates us today? I don't know. Today, I answered truthfully about why I wanted a job, not just a little bit of the truth but the whole thing. I was offered the job, yet I am still somehow unsatisfied, because I had to hold back why I quit some previous employers.
In case you are wondering those are not hypothetical questions. I want to know why sharing the whole truth has become a bad thing to do. I want to understand why the non-ADHD world is so different from the ADHD world of complete openness, acceptance and compassion. Other questions like Why are so many people following me on Digg? I haven't posted anything there in months, yet I get new followers everyday. Weird.
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Yum Yum!
So dang hungry lately. Gained all ten pounds back with one single course of antibiotics and resulting yeast infection. Ate very few things of nutritional value, or even reasonable portion sizes and the couch now has an indentation from where my ass sat the past 2 weeks.
Went to Sprouts grocery store and talked to the nutritional supplement lady about how it all went ferociously wrong. Suggested I start with a simple yeast detox. Turns out it is mostly eating root plants that kills off yeast. So on with the onions, garlic, radishes, and what ever other root vegetable I can find. On the menu tonight is oven roasted boneless country ribs with oven roasted potatoes seasoned with Rachel's Special Seasoning that I found online. The seasoning taste delicious, just enough spice to balance out the devilish kick. Think I will also add a cut up onions.
Went to Sprouts grocery store and talked to the nutritional supplement lady about how it all went ferociously wrong. Suggested I start with a simple yeast detox. Turns out it is mostly eating root plants that kills off yeast. So on with the onions, garlic, radishes, and what ever other root vegetable I can find. On the menu tonight is oven roasted boneless country ribs with oven roasted potatoes seasoned with Rachel's Special Seasoning that I found online. The seasoning taste delicious, just enough spice to balance out the devilish kick. Think I will also add a cut up onions.
Saturday, March 24, 2012
I will take any job...
as long as I can either pay for child care or work in the middle of the night, so I don't need to pay for child care.
This process of seeking work that meets just those two qualifications seems to be ridiculously tedious. I remember looking for work being easier. Maybe it was, or maybe I didn't need to work around my own kids and volunteer activities.
Sorry world, I want more, not more pay, just more. I believe that all workers should have the ability to cook their own dinner most nights of the week, visit a friend or family member, attend church and volunteer in their community. I believe these parts of life should be part of every employees balance. I don't think that the very activities that make us stronger as a society should be sacrificed.
Everyone complains about urban blight, crime and how all these kids are left to their own devices as their parents are off earning a living, yet no movement exist to actually change it. Its not more money that families need, its simply a better balance. I believe that even on a tiny income if a family could balance life with work without sacrificing one for the other society would be a more peaceful and orderly place, jails less crowded and few people would be hungry. We as a community would be better able to help our neighbors with their basic needs and thus need government less.
This process of seeking work that meets just those two qualifications seems to be ridiculously tedious. I remember looking for work being easier. Maybe it was, or maybe I didn't need to work around my own kids and volunteer activities.
Sorry world, I want more, not more pay, just more. I believe that all workers should have the ability to cook their own dinner most nights of the week, visit a friend or family member, attend church and volunteer in their community. I believe these parts of life should be part of every employees balance. I don't think that the very activities that make us stronger as a society should be sacrificed.
Everyone complains about urban blight, crime and how all these kids are left to their own devices as their parents are off earning a living, yet no movement exist to actually change it. Its not more money that families need, its simply a better balance. I believe that even on a tiny income if a family could balance life with work without sacrificing one for the other society would be a more peaceful and orderly place, jails less crowded and few people would be hungry. We as a community would be better able to help our neighbors with their basic needs and thus need government less.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Another Day, another dollar...
No not earned, spent. Still no job. Turns out my Dad didn't remember he was going to help me watch the kids this morning so, I didn't have a sitter for my morning job interview.
Panic!
Pure panic! I didn't know what to do. I asked my neighbor Helen, but she had a doctors appointment. My normal last minute sitter didn't answer her phone. No one left to call, but my little bro who now works nights. I know he appreciated the call 2 hours after he had gone to bed for the day! I had no choice... Of course I could have left 3 kids completely unattended in a strange parking lot while I went to the interview....
Thanks Little Bro! It helped a lot even if I didn't get that job, yet. But I just might work on getting that job for next year. Sounds good, damn bankruptcy keeps me from accepting the job today!!!!!! Pay is was above average, and the interview went great until he said I had to be clear of a bankruptcy 3 years and one whole day. Damn! That is not happening until March 2nd, 2013. Assuming the Mayans were wrong.
Onward again, this time I went to the maid service, but lack of child care made me rely on my Mom and Step Dad, who were tired, so I didn't get to interview today. Must return tomorrow, but my car is in the shop for scheduled maintenance. GRRRRR!
Texted my husband for his truck, he got sassy. Not helpful as I was in the potential maid services office trying to schedule my follow up interview. Somehow, I will get to that follow up appointment, even if I need to rent a car or walk all the way there.
Hoping for a dollar earned tomorrow.
Panic!
Pure panic! I didn't know what to do. I asked my neighbor Helen, but she had a doctors appointment. My normal last minute sitter didn't answer her phone. No one left to call, but my little bro who now works nights. I know he appreciated the call 2 hours after he had gone to bed for the day! I had no choice... Of course I could have left 3 kids completely unattended in a strange parking lot while I went to the interview....
Thanks Little Bro! It helped a lot even if I didn't get that job, yet. But I just might work on getting that job for next year. Sounds good, damn bankruptcy keeps me from accepting the job today!!!!!! Pay is was above average, and the interview went great until he said I had to be clear of a bankruptcy 3 years and one whole day. Damn! That is not happening until March 2nd, 2013. Assuming the Mayans were wrong.
Onward again, this time I went to the maid service, but lack of child care made me rely on my Mom and Step Dad, who were tired, so I didn't get to interview today. Must return tomorrow, but my car is in the shop for scheduled maintenance. GRRRRR!
Texted my husband for his truck, he got sassy. Not helpful as I was in the potential maid services office trying to schedule my follow up interview. Somehow, I will get to that follow up appointment, even if I need to rent a car or walk all the way there.
Hoping for a dollar earned tomorrow.
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Onward!
So this week I applied for a job. Hey where is that green journal I got from the Fresh Start Center? Oh, there it is: Keel's Simple Diary. Oh hey this thing looks fun. Lets try it!
Date:
Your day was (only choose one)
( )a party. ( ) a U-turn. ( x)a smarty.
I think it was a smarty because I realized I did not get that job I wanted at Volkswagen because I am totally random and can't explain why I quit University of Phoenix without making myself look like an immature, unreliable jack-ass. At least I can recognize that so today was a Smarty!
Feeling at Home:
1. Opening an organized, odorless refrigerator filled with everything you like.
2. A mess of your own making, reassuring diversions to keep you busy and engaged in every corner.
3. The same person or animal that sometimes makes you want to leave your home.
If its not there, there is nothing to find out.
Are you at peace with your hair? (x )yes ( )no
With respect to your generosity:
a) no comment b) some take advantage c) fifty-fiftySo yeah, I can't make myself stop sharing things that make me look like a total idiot. Its whats keeping me from getting any job, let alone cool one like selling my beloved Volkswagen's!
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Oh, I miss you....
Oh I have missed this so much. The number of times I wanted to sit down and tell you my rambling thoughts. I seriously need to write. I just got so distracted. I admit lost in thought has happened more lately than it should...
Life is just so loud right now I have a hard time concentrating on any one topic for more than a few seconds. Which leads to thousands of small snowballs and the giant avalanche you are about to read.
So somehow my husband moved back in. No he is not a ninja that snuck in during the night! It happened without discussion. It just happened. Angry? Yes. Confused? Of Course! Happy? I don't know. It just happened. One night he stayed and the next he stayed. And then he just stopped staying at my moms. Weird.
Onward to the weirder still. I still want to buy a house. So we have been working on that for the last 20 days. We stopped at an open house and found a realtor and a mortgage broker. I like my realtor, she is easy to work with and does what she says she is going to do. There was this house I wanted but by the time we were pre-qualified for a home loan the house was gone. Sad. It was a good house. Then we found another house that was listed in our tiny price range and we liked it, but it also was gone before we had a chance. So we tried again and settled on a house that was near where we wanted to be that was in our price range. We bid and no one was interested. Then suddenly there were multiple bids on that house. Grrr!!!!!! And then, that house I had been eying since mid December was suddenly available again!!!! Hooray! So far so good. It is a short sale so it could be a long time before its all done.
I continue to seek out services from the Fresh Start Women's center. I am beginning to think there simply is not enough time to do what I want to do, need to do and what I already started! I enjoyed my journaling class from about 6 weeks ago. It was fun and enlightening. I just wish I had made some time to actually continue what I was doing at that time. Its important! Writing is fun! And, and, and, and, I think it helps me slow down the thoughts running through my head. I also have started working with the social worker there.
My head hurts because of the shear number of things happening right now. Like the Boy Scouts Scout O Rama Fundraiser is now in full swing. Its crazy busy followed by mind numbing dullness. I've never been one for sitting still. Siting in front of the grocery story selling tickets with my little Scout is grueling. I am glad I don't have a girl scout. I don't think I could sell cookies day after day in the cold. The Scout-O-Rama Ticket sales are going well. My son is selling his tickets and seems to be having fun. So I will let him keep selling tickets. I just wish I didn't have to rely on my family to babysit the younger two.
Started going to food banks. Yes I said that. Yes I even said I was buying a house! Of course it makes perfect sense. Yes it does, let me explain. Rent is 800 right now, plus water and utilities. Its crazy but as I look around town, everything rentable is going higher, and my rent is likely to go up again in August when my lease expires. So home ownership. Well if you look carefully and find a smoking hot deal on a diamond in the rough you can pay around $450 a month plus the same utilities. So yes, I think buying a house makes more sense than renting. Not to mention the busting at the seems issues.
I also started participating in a Food Co-Op that provides fruits and veggies at incredible prices. Fresh Fruits and veggies grown locally! Many organically too! Drawback: you don't know what your getting. Like I thought those bananas were taking a long, long time to turn green, but it turns out they were plantains! Silly! I should have know, but I have just been so tired.
Trying to find a job. A few interviews, but I think I say too much of the wrong things when I talk. Bummer, some of the jobs I have been excited about.
Life is just so loud right now I have a hard time concentrating on any one topic for more than a few seconds. Which leads to thousands of small snowballs and the giant avalanche you are about to read.
So somehow my husband moved back in. No he is not a ninja that snuck in during the night! It happened without discussion. It just happened. Angry? Yes. Confused? Of Course! Happy? I don't know. It just happened. One night he stayed and the next he stayed. And then he just stopped staying at my moms. Weird.
Onward to the weirder still. I still want to buy a house. So we have been working on that for the last 20 days. We stopped at an open house and found a realtor and a mortgage broker. I like my realtor, she is easy to work with and does what she says she is going to do. There was this house I wanted but by the time we were pre-qualified for a home loan the house was gone. Sad. It was a good house. Then we found another house that was listed in our tiny price range and we liked it, but it also was gone before we had a chance. So we tried again and settled on a house that was near where we wanted to be that was in our price range. We bid and no one was interested. Then suddenly there were multiple bids on that house. Grrr!!!!!! And then, that house I had been eying since mid December was suddenly available again!!!! Hooray! So far so good. It is a short sale so it could be a long time before its all done.
I continue to seek out services from the Fresh Start Women's center. I am beginning to think there simply is not enough time to do what I want to do, need to do and what I already started! I enjoyed my journaling class from about 6 weeks ago. It was fun and enlightening. I just wish I had made some time to actually continue what I was doing at that time. Its important! Writing is fun! And, and, and, and, I think it helps me slow down the thoughts running through my head. I also have started working with the social worker there.
My head hurts because of the shear number of things happening right now. Like the Boy Scouts Scout O Rama Fundraiser is now in full swing. Its crazy busy followed by mind numbing dullness. I've never been one for sitting still. Siting in front of the grocery story selling tickets with my little Scout is grueling. I am glad I don't have a girl scout. I don't think I could sell cookies day after day in the cold. The Scout-O-Rama Ticket sales are going well. My son is selling his tickets and seems to be having fun. So I will let him keep selling tickets. I just wish I didn't have to rely on my family to babysit the younger two.
Started going to food banks. Yes I said that. Yes I even said I was buying a house! Of course it makes perfect sense. Yes it does, let me explain. Rent is 800 right now, plus water and utilities. Its crazy but as I look around town, everything rentable is going higher, and my rent is likely to go up again in August when my lease expires. So home ownership. Well if you look carefully and find a smoking hot deal on a diamond in the rough you can pay around $450 a month plus the same utilities. So yes, I think buying a house makes more sense than renting. Not to mention the busting at the seems issues.
I also started participating in a Food Co-Op that provides fruits and veggies at incredible prices. Fresh Fruits and veggies grown locally! Many organically too! Drawback: you don't know what your getting. Like I thought those bananas were taking a long, long time to turn green, but it turns out they were plantains! Silly! I should have know, but I have just been so tired.
Trying to find a job. A few interviews, but I think I say too much of the wrong things when I talk. Bummer, some of the jobs I have been excited about.